Saturday, January 7, 2012

This is all new to me.

There's this guy. I guess I'll call him a friend, although he's more of a friend of a friend. He's part of this group of folks I associate with, and he wears so many hats, so to speak, that I could have predicted the giant clusterfuck that eventually occurred. He's my friend's business partner, and close friend, and he started dating this friend's BFF. Guy and BFF got pretty serious, and moved in together. Then Friend and Guy (who are business partners, remember) decided to bring BFF into the business as well. So if you're following along, we have three individuals - two ladies and a dude - who are all in business together, close friends in real life, two of whom are in a romantic relationship, and they party together all the time. Sounds like a recipe for disaster if you ask me, but ... that's how it goes. There's the back story.
Anyway. This guy always struck me as a little disingenuous, but I just chalked it up to him being a salesman. I was shocked to recently learn that this guy is just an absolute snake and pathological liar. Without getting into even more excruciating detail, I'll just say that he royally screwed over his business partner AND girlfriend, doing things that were illegal, immoral, shady, and just fucked up in general. Yesterday, I learned just how deep all of this stuff runs, and it's's like a movie. Truth is stranger than fiction and all of that. This guy has screwed up all his relationships and his entire life with such magnitude, I can't even imagine a resolution beyond him moving to another state and starting over. (And actually, I think that was part of his plan, before it all blew up in his face.)

Obviously, all his close friends are disappointed and angry, and feel betrayed and used. I feel a little of that too, for a completely different reason. See, when this guy and I did occasionally hang out and party together, we had several conversations that led me to believe that, disingenuous or not, he was a man of faith. He was one of the first people I looked to who helped me get my head around the notion that yes, I can be a Christian, and still be a normal person. He was one of the first Christians I knew who wasn't judgmental, or "all or nothing." I can honestly say that he at least partially influenced me to commit myself to my faith. So, as  ridiculous as it sounds, I am super disappointed that he has turned out to be such a complete fuck. I'm not so naive as to believe Christians - any Christians - are perfect. Hypocritical, secret behavior among holier-than-though Christians is what drove me away from the church in the first place. So I was happy and relieved to meet this guy, and find that there could be a balance - that I could be a follower of Jesus and still drink beer and watch Family Guy. Y'know? I know it's lame of me to hold him to any standard at all - he's human and he's gonna do stupid things like anybody, but, damn. 

So, I'm processing that a little bit. I know, like I said, that I shouldn't be surprised or disappointed, but I am. 

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

So THAT'S what coffee tastes like.

Well. One of the things I'd sort of like to do is give up artificial sweeteners. I say "sort of" because I don't WANT to give them up at all - I LOVE Diet Dr. Pepper, and I LOVE Splenda in my coffee. However, I keep reading about how shitty it is and how it's slowly killing all of us, and how it inflames arthritis pain, and how it actually sabotages your diet efforts. So, there's that. Today, I had my coffee without Splenda. I still used my full-of-chemicals creamer, though. Baby steps. Baby steps.